Football Humorists Gifts

Misery/Torment/N.Y. Football

'Spit him out, Vince! This is just practice. Save the rough stuff for the game.'

Open mike night presents Sadie Cohen. Summer's almost over

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Football Chameleon

Punt Cake

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

Alternative fielding positions

'Now that's the Group of Death.'

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Trojan Hurdler.

"Getting the hang of it?"

Sloth 10K.

The Hockey World

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

'Sean Connery was the best James Bond!'

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

Small country advertisng at the Olympics

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

Various men worshipping a statue of a football

'He's definitely heading for a red card.'

'Robert.....Why do you think they call slanted letters italics.'

'It Kicked!' - 'Punt, Drop or Tad?'

"With one wrong turn, Sparky's big adventure became a nightmare."

Pigs form huddles before taking up starting positions

'He migrates through every year about this time. Just sits there and watches. We leave him alone and he leaves us alone...'

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

Football Game Tickets. These seats are so far from the field we'll need a passport to get to them!

Footballer kicking his own brain.

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!