Football Comedian Gifts

French football explained - 50p.

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Punt Cake

Football Chameleon

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

Alternative fielding positions

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

Trojan Hurdler.

'Clear out your desk, Randy. ...NEXT!'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

Cricket - The Pride of the Village.

"Pastrami. My favorite, Chad. But I asked for the 'sand wedge.'"

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

'Sean Connery was the best James Bond!'

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

'It looks suspiciously like Killer Hart is taking a dive!'

Small country advertisng at the Olympics

Jocko, a man for all sports' seasons.

Various men worshipping a statue of a football

'He's definitely heading for a red card.'

Pigs form huddles before taking up starting positions

Footballer kicking his own brain.

'He migrates through every year about this time. Just sits there and watches. We leave him alone and he leaves us alone...'

"With one wrong turn, Sparky's big adventure became a nightmare."

'Robert.....Why do you think they call slanted letters italics.'