Food Allergy Ponderer Pillows

The beginnings of biological warfare were relatively innocent.

'How is the water prepared?'

"Wow! So you think my chronic self-hatred may just be an undiagnosed case of lactose intolerance?"

Fountain of Youth/Fountain of Bacon

'The good news is that you don't have mad cow's disease. The bad news is you are lactose intolerant.'

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

'Fear of getting caught is understandable but fear of water, I think, requires counselling.'

"Mouse? No. They contain cheese and I'm lactose intolerant."

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

The Nihilist Deli.

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

'Gretel, she's lying. It's not gluten free!'

"Excuse me, Father...is the host gluten-free?"

'It's getting harder every day to make a living at this.'

"Sad really. He's scared of heights."

Gluten-free Santa

"If you eat gluten, we have a ton of it in the back."

Dr. McPhee discovers the Embarrassment Particle.

'The worst part is I'm afraid of the water.'

Never being able to think of the right thing to say at the right time phobia.

The mysterious world of ligand substitution

"Happy Birthday, dear! It's gluten-free, lactose-free and sugar-free."

'It's gluten-free or free range or something. Enjoy.'

World Meat Consumptiom

We Honor Major Credit Cards and Most Dietary Restrictions

"I don't think I could fit another slice in...oh, hold on."

Physicists at the Fourth Grotschlov Conference assembled to determine once and for all if light is a wave or a particle.

"So, it's Gluten free, lactose free and meat free. How does it taste?"

'Why didn't you say you were Lactose intolerant in the first place?'

The Gluten is Free. RUN!

'Whatever diet they're on, tell them what they ordered is perfect for them.'

"It's the gluten-free edition."

"Hello! - Have you ever thought about changing your energy supplier..?"