Food Allergy Explorer Pillows

It turns out celiac disease is thousands of years old. Yet I still never heard about "gluten" till recently. What do you think that means, Randy? It obviously means big wheat has some explaining to do. They must've altered the grains. I don't know. Maybe it's because our environment has gotten cleaner. So since our antibodies haven't had to work as hard, they've gotten weaker. HOJ. If there's one thing you'd know about, little buddy, it's atrophy. We should have our own science show.

"Wow! So you think my chronic self-hatred may just be an undiagnosed case of lactose intolerance?"

'The good news is that you don't have mad cow's disease. The bad news is you are lactose intolerant.'

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

"Mouse? No. They contain cheese and I'm lactose intolerant."

The Nihilist Deli.

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

Attack of the 'health' foods

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

'Gretel, she's lying. It's not gluten free!'

"Excuse me, Father...is the host gluten-free?"

'It's getting harder every day to make a living at this.'

Gluten-free Santa

Squirrel in tree with t-shirt saying ''may contain nuts.'

"If you eat gluten, we have a ton of it in the back."

"Happy Birthday, dear! It's gluten-free, lactose-free and sugar-free."

"Everything on the menu can be prepared with no gluten, standard gluten, or extra gluten."

'It's gluten-free or free range or something. Enjoy.'

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

"So, it's Gluten free, lactose free and meat free. How does it taste?"

'Why didn't you say you were Lactose intolerant in the first place?'

"He's allergic to peanuts, sensitive to wheat, lactose-intolerant, and just plain weirded out by fruit."

"It's the gluten-free edition."

"Ding dong bell, Pussy's into wellness."

'Well, this is a first- you seem to be allergic to distilled water.'

"Are there nuts in this?"

'Cool snack, Tommy! My folks are into health foods too!'

Gluten-Free Church

'Whatever diet they're on, tell them what they ordered is perfect for them.'

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."

The Gluten is Free. RUN!

'It's wheat-free, dairy-free, fat-free, nut-free, sugar-free and salt-free...enjoy!

'Is the homework gluten free?'

"None of our items are gluten-free, but they are prepared by people who are."