Food Sensitivity Seeker Pillows

"It's not surprising I'm gluten intolerant. I'm intolerant of pretty much everything."

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

"Mouse? No. They contain cheese and I'm lactose intolerant."

'Gretel, she's lying. It's not gluten free!'

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

'It's getting harder every day to make a living at this.'

Gluten-free Santa

Squirrel in tree with t-shirt saying ''may contain nuts.'

"Everything on the menu can be prepared with no gluten, standard gluten, or extra gluten."

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

Box of Tissues

"It's the gluten-free edition."

Gluten-Free Church

"Are there nuts in this?"

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."

We Honor Major Credit Cards and Most Dietary Restrictions

"He's allergic to peanuts, sensitive to wheat, lactose-intolerant, and just plain weirded out by fruit."

Does this contain garlic?

"It's gluten/carb/fat/preservative/sugar-free. Enjoy your Celery Supreme."

"Y' know, a GOOD host would provide a lactose-free option!"

"Well, my wife is lactose-maltose-dextrose-sucrose-cellulose intolerant, which means I can't even hand her an empty box of candy."

"What? I have a nut allergy."

The Last Thanksgiving

'I'm sorry sir, but this highway is lactose intolerant.'

"Everything on the menu can be prepared with no gluten, standard gluten or extra gluten."

'Please sir, does this contain nuts?'

"White bread? Do you have any idea how much gluten is in those crumbs?!"

"Now Harold, you know those always give you heartburn."

'Rick and I have decided to be more sensitive.'

First Church of Gluten-Free Communion Wafers.

No Peanut Zone.

"I'm lactose-intolerant, so can I say 'beans' instead?"