Food Allergy Warrior Pillows

"Why do I send you shopping? You never read the labels!"

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

"Robert has resolved to be more tolerant. He's starting off slowly with lactose."

"Er, um, no thanks. We're both lactose intolerant."

Interviews with Dietary Refugees.

'You are severely allergic to monosodium glutamate.'

'Help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

"Everything on the menu can be prepared with no gluten, standard gluten, or extra gluten."

"Well, my wife is lactose-maltose-dextrose-sucrose-cellulose intolerant, which means I can't even hand her an empty box of candy."

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."

"Y' know, a GOOD host would provide a lactose-free option!"

"It's gluten/carb/fat/preservative/sugar-free. Enjoy your Celery Supreme."

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

"Wow! So you think my chronic self-hatred may just be an undiagnosed case of lactose intolerance?"

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

Allergy Information: May contain traces of nuts, soya, child bones.

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

"Mouse? No. They contain cheese and I'm lactose intolerant."

The Nihilist Deli.

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

"I can't have anything that's a food."

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

"How many more times, you've got hayfever, so no, you can't have any cannabis oil."

'Oh yeah, ths boss is going to love the new hire.'

Gluten-free Santa

Squirrel in tree with t-shirt saying ''may contain nuts.'

Protecting Nature

Way Too Genetically Engineered Chicken

"Yeah, it's a drag, but the only flight I could get was a red-eye."

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

Gluten-Free Church

"Are there nuts in this?"

The Inverted Nose: Genetic engineering's answer to the sniffles.