Flood Fiction Fan Gifts

'...and this is the water garden...'

The Reason Ed isn't mentioned in the bible.

Noah suddenly regrets using the IKEA flatpack end-of-the-world Ark design.

"It's cool – God told us to!"

"This is impossible. Let's take the next boat."

Noah's lesser known brother.

'Ha, water from the sky indeed. What's next, I wonder? Colors in the sky in the shape of an arc? This guy's a real whack job."

'Woah the cartoon's sprung a leak again!'

'Your father spent so much time building the ark he didn't have time to study navigation.'

"May, I don't care how wet the toilet seat gets, I turned the water off last time."

"Perhaps if you guys just swam along behind us for a while."

"Try 'gr8food'."

"You may want to rethink the Postal Creedo."

"Venice! What will climate change think of next?"

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

'Luxury cruise you said!'

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

'I don't care what the blueprints say, I'm certain HE strongly suggested a roof.'

Captain steering house through flood.

'Hello Colin, I'm Arthur, any idea what all the fuss is about?'

Noah's life jacket demonstration

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'...and the property lies in a beautiful valley by the banks of the river...'

'Expecting a bit of wet weather Reg...?'

"I thought you meant we had a security leak."

"Sorry, Noah, these are all mid-sized. You'll have to eat the leftovers."

'If we could just sink Noah's Ark, think of the variety of food we could sample...'

The chosen few

'A feasibility study has been ordered into a High Speed Submarine link between London and Birmingham.'

'What do they mean 'is borer a beast of the field'?'

Climate Change Contingency House

"I say we throw the damn things overboard."

"When the rubber duck reaches eye level it's a flood. . . wow, brilliant!"

'That Noah's some sailor, the World is covered in water and he runs aground!'

'Well why did you put the cats next to the mice?'