Fish Joke Fan Gifts

'What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?'

"You may be in love, but can you support my daughter on what a herring makes?"

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

Fisherman pulling out hook with sign on it saying 'Gone Swimmin'.

'The worst part is I'm afraid of the water.'

'My advice? Dump him! There are plenty more fish in the sea...'

Fish Workout

"Just ignore them. They're summer people."

Whale Whale Whale.

Take two of these with a glass of air.

Man on combine harvester, harvesting a river of fish

'Get lost, two's company, three's a shoal.'

Sworn Anenome

"I don't know, how long can you tread water?"

"Seriously, you have to stop getting up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water."

Fire Exit

"And that's why there aren't any fish comedians."

Putting on ice

'Gimme your wallet! I've got a salmon, and it's farmed'

Fish with Human Trophy

"My memory is awful, so stop me if I've told this one before."

Fishing from a Fish

'The last thing I heard was 'Nonsense, Piranhas look way different!''

'Another foreclosure.'

'And that's the difference between internet and intranet.'

Wild Wild Salmon

"You've got your scales on backward."

'The problem with living in water is I can never tell when my contact lens is in!'

"Don't worry Josh, there's plenty more fish in the sea."

'You can't expect fame and fortune from selling just your fillet of sole to the devil.'

Fisherman pulling out hook with sign on it saying 'Got anything better than worms?'

'Any luck?'

"I'm voting for whoever promises to keep my house underwater."

"I forget which one of us is the therapist."