Fish Comedy Fan Gifts

'Get lost, two's company, three's a shoal.'

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

'What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?'

Fisherman pulling out hook with sign on it saying 'Gone Swimmin'.

'Steroids.'

"Is really wet, here!"

'The worst part is I'm afraid of the water.'

Fish Workout

'My advice? Dump him! There are plenty more fish in the sea...'

"Has anyone fed the goldfish?"

"Just ignore them. They're summer people."

"We've ruled out Islamophobia and Homophobia. Let's turn to food phobias. How do you feel about Tilapia?"

"Don't worry, I quite enjoy a fishy breath: Now, open wide..."

'Well, sorry, but I can't see anything exciting happening anytime soon...'

Take two of these with a glass of air.

'Like they say, 'give a man a fish, he can eat for a day. Give him a fish store, he can go bankrupt.'

'Say on the papers!'

'Gimme your wallet! I've got a salmon, and it's farmed'

"I don't know, how long can you tread water?"

"Seriously, you have to stop getting up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water."

Fire Exit

"And that's why there aren't any fish comedians."

Putting on ice

"You know what I'm sick of? Krill."

Fish with Human Trophy

'Another foreclosure.'

"You just graduated from the best, most fun school ever! Nice!"

"My memory is awful, so stop me if I've told this one before."

'The problem with living in water is I can never tell when my contact lens is in!'

"Don't worry Josh, there's plenty more fish in the sea."

Wild Wild Salmon

Fisherman pulling out hook with sign on it saying 'Got anything better than worms?'