First Contact Fan Gifts

'Hey, who's your friend?'

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

First aid in mountains

Ants dressed as businessmen going to work.

Life on Earth - The original chat room.

'Adam seems depressed - He needs camaraderie or something.'

'Worker or Soldier: Is that all you can suggest? Not much of a choice is there!...'

Dog being carried off by ducks.

"Now why would a seagull fly in here and try to establish a rapport with me?"

Tea Snob.

'Burf, I think the ants are trying to tell us something.

'Your fish dinner should be along shortly. Frank just had a nibble.'

"At this time boarding first will be all first class passengers, a.k.a. the more important people on this flight."

'He had been like this since he broke his nose.'

"That is one incredibly fast and freaked-out squirrel."

'Please prepare this memo about reducing the use of our photocopiers and give each of our staff a copy. Send them a second copy, as a reminder, in two weeks and send a third reminder the following week.'

'And how often have you been to see Die Fledemaus?'

Hi, my name's Pam and I'll be your paramedic for the evening.

'Wow, you're absolutely right! From up here, they look EXACTLY like us!'

"Take us to your least douchebag leader."

The Hydro-Multi-Aeroplane

'How do you know all these cats? I've never even met them.'

President, first lady and mischievous first lad.

'How come no one ever sends me a fax?'

Efficiency Expert Greeting

Door to door salesman selling anti aging cream

'You really should work on your people skills.'

'I don't get it... I'm in water all the time but I can't get rid of that fish smell.'

'No that's not Steve, that's Margaret, - Steve died of a heart attack last year...'

'We're no fly by night operation.'

"Tell me about it!"

"I'm a brand loyalist. I only buy brand new."

"Darling, Mother faxed her tuna-casserole recipe all the way from Ohio."