Financially Challenged Chuckler Gifts

"First the good news. You'll never have to worry about identity theft."

Cafe investors: I'd like your support in acquiring the lemonade stand down the street. By cutting redundant labor, marketing and technology. I place our annual savings at $17 billion. The phone company investors bought it. Can monkey lick your head?

Moo-Magrams Exams

'Ain't no lonelier life than being a free-range chicken boy.'

Kisses--Sniff Your A-hole.

The Big Four debate banking ethics

"Isn't this just a repeat of his 1332 Christmas special."

'Before I give you the bill,do you suffer from heart trouble, high blood pressure,or sudden shock syndrome?'

'I warned you, Dr. Jekyll. It was a bad idea to give an additional credit card to Mr. Hyde.'

'I know the zoo had cutbacks but this is ridiculous!'

Bankruptcy court

"Business is terrible. I've already had to refill with red ink two times this month."

'Every time I get paid my creditors form a flash mob.'

'Time's up, chuckles.'

"Damn it—I think I just butt-donated to a charity."

J-J-JOE'S B-B-BAR, 'Actually, Joe's done pretty well for a guy with a speech impediment.'

"Will this be cash or consumer debt?"

"I've found it the easiest way to administer nose drops!"

"Your total is $10.97 and this is only $6."

"I can't call nobody on this newfangled dang cellular telephone!"

Man buying 'Caviar Wiz'

"The preceding PBS program was funded by do-gooders...not by freeloaders like yourself."

Yeah, Fred's a real credit to the human race. He owes everyone.

Hello, you have reached the Johnsons. All of our family members are currently busy sharing the events of their day. Please continue to hold, and the next available 4-year-old will be with you shortly. Machines Programmed for Telemarketers.

"I did warn you about the after effects."

'I gave at the office.'

"Are you sure you've got sufficient funds in your account to cover this cheque?"

'Thank goodness Robert Green deflected attention.'

Clancy: Women and Horse-Racing

"I think you need to work on your pelvic floor exercises, dear!"

Oil Pressure.

'The guy who hacked our banks' computer has transfered 10,- to us when he saw our balance...'

'Walter doesn't trust banks.'

"Rona you say, well nice to meet you." (man talking to the corona virus)