Fetch Philosopher Gifts

'I'm sorry, but don't you think fetch is a little overrated?'

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

'Fetch.'

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

"I throw this ball, you go get it and bring it back — everything else will fall into place."

A man and his dog

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

'Super Dog'

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

"I'm working from home today."

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

Super hero dog.

Boy and his dog

"....And what's the deal with fetch? You want the stick or don't you? Make up your mind already!"

"What other tricks does he need?"

"Throw, fetch, throw, fetch, throw, fetch. It all seems so obsessive-compulsive."

'I'll fetch your newspaper and your pipe, but the slippers thing is just too kinky.'

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

"Take a right at Rocky's fire hydrant. A left at Duke's bench and the dog part will be one block past buddy's tree."

'I'll bet you taught him that!'

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

"Let's try 'roll over.' We can come back to this."

"Give it up—Frisbee is your game."

"DID YOU SEND THIS?"

"I'm taking a gap year and then getting my Master's in Fetching and Staying."

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

"Watch his feet - if he doesn't step into the throw, he's going to fake it."

"Forget it - she's out of your league."

"Have you consider the possibility that I don't want the paper?"