Fence Fixers Gifts

"Whoa. Jeff. You snagged your sweater."

"We're never going to resolve this if you won't get your own sword."

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

The Popularity of Pickleball Inspires a New Wave of Hybrid Sports.

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

'I'm moving up to be Chairperson-of-the-board. One of you will be President.' (Men have fencing swords).

"I take it the toilet is fixed?"

En garde!

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

Zorro as a child.

'The upside is that if the water gets high enough all your termites might drown.'

'Are you sure you brought the right flat pack?'

"If we're musketeers, why can't we just shoot people? with muskets?"

George was a bit intimidated by his IKEA self-assembly wardrobe.

'Two men having a sword fight with large pen and pencil.'

Triumphant mouse posing like Perseus holding aloft Medusa's head.

"I thought you were out front telling the fence company how to do their job."

"She does this when she's tired."

"I told you we needed deeper foundations!"

Chair - Ready for Self Assembly.

'Yes, you were abandoned. But then I adopted you. Why are you still taking it out on my couch?'

Philip Nye – cycle chiropractor

DIY.

"I can't find the instructions."

"I bit someone once, but It was just to establish credibility."

"Well, I thought I'd give fencing a try, but I sucked at it."

Super glue . . .

'Dad, perhaps the fan should suck instead of blow?'

Man in office fencing with pieces of paper flying about

Irritable dowel syndrome

Swords for Making America Great Again

Jude completely misunderstands his doctor's request for a stool sample.

En-guard dog.

Son? We need to talk about inappropriate life choices. I was joking. I'm not going to be an investment banker. Great! I'd hate to see you waste your talents. There are plenty of other jobs. Like the fixer who disappears famous athletes' awkward e-mails. You'll always be employed.

Rancher builds fence around angry bull.