Feline Furniture Destroyer Gifts

"Isn't that cute? She bought herself a little stool to sit on and watch us shred her chairs!"

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

A disgruntled employee chain-sawes hois boss's desk in two.Boss says:'Alright Smith, I'll stop referring to the employees as 'oopsy daisies'.'

"Why don't you come get me? Oh that's right, you aren't allowed on the couch!"

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

'Don't look at me!'

A Cat becomes the victim of a broken spring in an armchair.

'The butler did it.'

"You said to pack only the essentials, and this couch is essential for my afternoon naps."

"You wouldn't believe a little dog like that could create so much hair."

'We're gonna need a bigger couch.'

'Sorry darling: I'm a great ape, I can use primitive tools, but this is too difficult for me...'

'I used to wrap the couch in plastic, but this is better.'

"Coool! How much for the bean bag chair?"

"I don't allow pets on the furniture, but I do allow them on the guests."

Uses of a Dead Car in History: '...and probably with a reasonably blunt instrument.'

'She thinks she's the cat's meow just because she was on Antiques Roadshow.'

Seat Belt

Not complaining, but when do you think your cats will be done sleeping on the furniture?

"Thanks. I feel much better now."

'I don't CARE if they were marked down 35 percent. That set of drapes goes back to the store!'

"Thanks. I feel much better now."

"I can totally see why dogs do this."

"Sorry about the chairs, dear, but I'm desperate for wood chips!"

'Oh, for heaven's sake! We had him declawed, but he's still destroying furniture as much as ever!'

'Table for two...'

'Ripping furniture to shreds doesn't turn me on anymore. What I'd like to get my claws on is somebody's reputation.'

STRIP *Bliss* # 2 Cat stuck in new wardrobe

'That's the problem with cats - they can be so destructive.'

'We need to get him a scratching post.'

'In the interest of saving time, do you have any pre-shredded ones?'

"Hey, I'm just making your sofa match your jeans."

'You'll just have to accept it that they're more concerned with their furniture than with you.'

101 uses of a dead cat: ornament