Feline Furniture Destroyer Pillows

"Isn't that cute? She bought herself a little stool to sit on and watch us shred her chairs!"

A disgruntled employee chain-sawes hois boss's desk in two.Boss says:'Alright Smith, I'll stop referring to the employees as 'oopsy daisies'.'

"Why don't you come get me? Oh that's right, you aren't allowed on the couch!"

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

'The butler did it.'

"You said to pack only the essentials, and this couch is essential for my afternoon naps."

"You wouldn't believe a little dog like that could create so much hair."

'We're gonna need a bigger couch.'

'Sorry darling: I'm a great ape, I can use primitive tools, but this is too difficult for me...'

'I used to wrap the couch in plastic, but this is better.'

Seat Belt

"Coool! How much for the bean bag chair?"

'She thinks she's the cat's meow just because she was on Antiques Roadshow.'

Uses of a Dead Car in History: '...and probably with a reasonably blunt instrument.'

"I don't allow pets on the furniture, but I do allow them on the guests."

"Thanks. I feel much better now."

"Thanks. I feel much better now."

'I don't CARE if they were marked down 35 percent. That set of drapes goes back to the store!'

"Sorry about the chairs, dear, but I'm desperate for wood chips!"

"I can totally see why dogs do this."

'That's the problem with cats - they can be so destructive.'

'Ripping furniture to shreds doesn't turn me on anymore. What I'd like to get my claws on is somebody's reputation.'

STRIP *Bliss* # 2 Cat stuck in new wardrobe

'Table for two...'

'We need to get him a scratching post.'

'You'll just have to accept it that they're more concerned with their furniture than with you.'

"Hey, I'm just making your sofa match your jeans."

'In the interest of saving time, do you have any pre-shredded ones?'

101 uses of a dead cat: ornament