Furniture Destroyers Gifts

'Ripping furniture to shreds doesn't turn me on anymore. What I'd like to get my claws on is somebody's reputation.'

A disgruntled employee chain-sawes hois boss's desk in two.Boss says:'Alright Smith, I'll stop referring to the employees as 'oopsy daisies'.'

"Why don't you come get me? Oh that's right, you aren't allowed on the couch!"

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

'Wow...Your work is amazing!'

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

Bird collecting furniture for it's home.

'Don't look at me!'

"You wouldn't believe a little dog like that could create so much hair."

A clown walks into his living room and sees a balloon animal scratching up the furniture

Stuff Broken

Dog dreams of sleeping in masters chair.

Modern Furniture/Sculptures Object to Old Fashioned Chair.

Sale. We need something that will meet our growing backsides.

'Sorry darling: I'm a great ape, I can use primitive tools, but this is too difficult for me...'

'I used to wrap the couch in plastic, but this is better.'

'I see you opened it yourself, but there'll still be a service charge.'

Seat Belt

'So our son can't move back in -- furniture sale!'

The message that status symbols were so last year was getting through...

'You do nice work!'

"Thanks. I feel much better now."

Another quality job by Bulldozing for the Hell of It, Inc.

"I can totally see why dogs do this."

"It's your new IKEA store, sign here."

'...but when I said I wanted a NEW wardrobe....'

'We made the last payment and we were burning the mortgage to celebrate.'

'That's the problem with cats - they can be so destructive.'

Builder adjusting a wall.

'It looks like I'm finally going to break 70.. this is my 69th club I've broken.'

"Isn't that cute? She bought herself a little stool to sit on and watch us shred her chairs!"

'We need to get him a scratching post.'

'Is this the first time he's got 180?'

'In the interest of saving time, do you have any pre-shredded ones?'

Nesting Chairs