Farm Life Funny Gifts

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

Bill and Lester have a 'Hay Day'.

"Well, that one got away."

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

'Ya gotta love the way this farmer gets into Halloween spirit.'

Picks your own strawberries....Strangle your own turkeys

Golfer mistakes a hen's egg for his golf ball.

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

The pig that had a glimpse of the afterlife.

'He's fine, it's only man flu not swine flu.'

"I'm an enigma!"

'Do I really have to remind you again about which one of us earns the truffles, Jean-Claude?'

'We call these supernumerary teats!'

1,572 Performances.

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

'Hang on a minute...'

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

Milkin' Impossible

Cow Cong vs Toilet Rolls.

"I believe I can fly, I believe I can touch the sky..."

"Mum, please jump up and down . . . I feel like a milkshake."

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

I think that's what they call 'Googling yourself'!

"YAY! FREE SHIPPING!"

'Hey Sally, do these new capris make me look pretentious?'

'Watch out, Dewey! Cow pie!'

'Sheep striptease'.

#FAIL

'I'm sorry but I have to let you go, we're all drinking 2%.'

"I'd like to be the cream in your coffee."

'I don't think we should have any more eggs Chester. Maybe you should see the vet about having your chicken nuggets removed.'

'We like to keep our supply chain short.'

A mother and baby yak