Family Dynamics Observers Gifts

"No, John, I don’t remember the ‘Summer of Love.’ But I do recall the spring when you hit on my sister!"

"When do your in-laws leave?"

'What Burl just said was to sit down 'cause he's not ready to take you to the store yet, Ma!!'

'It's like this: I love this rubber tire and as soon as we're able, we're going to get married.'

"Take off the armband, Steve, we're only visiting my mother."

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

'Hi, I'm Bob and I'll be your waiter ... and this is my wife, Susan, and her two children from a former marriage, Jimmy and Cindy.'

"I'm an oldest child trapped in the body of a middle child."

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

"She bathes him. She feeds him. She burps him. Mother's a real micromanager."

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."

"Some day you'll look back at this and remember me as the person who taught you to fear water."

'It's funny really - when your father's home he hardly ever says a word!'

"Mom, are you sure I'm not adopted?"

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk - it's hard to believe we're related.'

"We tried to play nicely, but frankly it's not as much fun as tormenting each other."

'Simple case of gravity, mom.'

"I'm afraid these grades aren't giving me a very satisfying vicarious life."

I think it's time he left home.'

'It's time you learned, son - in-laws and outlaws aren't necessarily opposites.'

"Oh, you silly girl, you! Don't tell me you brought home another husband."

"You work for the family business, and I am your father, not the patriarchal oppressor..."

"It's easy to understand the theory of evolution when you have a brother!"

'Who says women don't like chase scenes?'

"Mom, are you going to properly vet the baby before you bring her home from the hospital?"

"We're looking forward to this little bundle of joy bringing out the worst in each of us."

"If it slows down, just ask my father about the murder he always swears he did not commit."

'A mother complex! Are you sure?'

'Okay, okay - is there anyone OTHER that the bride's mother who objects to this marriage?'