Family Dynamic Observer Gifts

"We've been thinking a lot about what we want to do with your life."

Dysfunctional family size products

"My wife has gone away for a few days."

I think it's time he left home.'

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

"I'll see if your mother would like something from the cheeseboard."

"I just had 'the talk' with Kyle. I learned quite a bit."

"We treat our customers like family. In other words send them to the naughty step when they talk back."

"This whole musical group thing just isn't working. And besides, I don't think Gracie's heart is in it anymore."

'Relax - she'll be down soon. But, before you go out with my little princess, I'd like to ask you a few questions.'

"Isn't calling me 'Katie Lee the 2nd' a bit melodramatic?!"

'Quite a lot of divorce in my family!'

'At least he won't be hard to live up to.'

"And God, please give clothes to all those poor naked girls on daddy's computer."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

'My folks are punishing me, but Grandma broke the embargo!'

'They like to call it 'parenting,' but it's just an outmoded seniority system.'

'I'll save the peas for later, when I can properly enjoy them in my room.'

'Harriet! I haven't seen you since we were kids. You remember my little brother Mitchell, don't you?'

Leaving the parental nest - Bride's father asking the groom to take care of his daughter.

Family Judging the Family Feud

What are we doing today? Installing raised beds. Then we'll plant them for a couple who want organic vegetables. Brilliant, Dad. Tree's Tree Nursery. You take the hard work out of gardening. Right. And give it to me! Right again!

Mom! When are you getting here? Hang on! I'm almost

'Sure, go ahead! Evolve! It's all the rage, I know! Have fun! I'll just sit here in this murky, primordial soup with nothing but plankton for company. Why should you stay here with your mother? The one who raised you, fed you...'

"It's his emotional support animal."

'Hi, I'm Bob and I'll be your waiter ... and this is my wife, Susan, and her two children from a former marriage, Jimmy and Cindy.'

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"Mom, are you sure I'm not adopted?"

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

Origins Of Evolution

'Simple case of gravity, mom.'

'A mother complex! Are you sure?'

"If it slows down, just ask my father about the murder he always swears he did not commit."