Modern Family Dynamic Observer Gifts

'All the time he used to spend watching TV is now spent on Facebook.'

'Sure, go ahead! Evolve! It's all the rage, I know! Have fun! I'll just sit here in this murky, primordial soup with nothing but plankton for company. Why should you stay here with your mother? The one who raised you, fed you...'

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

What are we doing today? Installing raised beds. Then we'll plant them for a couple who want organic vegetables. Brilliant, Dad. Tree's Tree Nursery. You take the hard work out of gardening. Right. And give it to me! Right again!

'Hi, I'm Bob and I'll be your waiter ... and this is my wife, Susan, and her two children from a former marriage, Jimmy and Cindy.'

'We're doing the right thing, Bob, Let Andy solve problems with bullies at school his own way,,,'

"Mom, are you sure I'm not adopted?"

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

Origins Of Evolution

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

"Attention, wanna-be son-in-law ... we're losing!"

'Simple case of gravity, mom.'

I think it's time he left home.'

"If it slows down, just ask my father about the murder he always swears he did not commit."

Look,that is not your Daddy

Waiting Room

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

'Tom's always been the black sheep of the family.'

"Just wait until my autobiographical one-woman show."

"Hey. Smells funny. Fix it. And bring me a beer."

"Really, Mr. Stevens, this fantasy of being turned into a giant frog is absurd. We both know there's no such thing as a curse, and you can't seriously believe your mother-in-law is actually a witch. . ."

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

"Your mom is a little overprotective, isn't she?"

'My principal wants to see you about my principles.'

"And what can I do for you, Sir?"

'Will I be able to have a night light if we switch to solar power?'

"Now mommy, I know there has been some bad blood between us."

"All this running around you do at night … it’s killing your mother."

'Yes, yes, honey, I'm watching you!'

'oh...You're home, just when my spirits were rising.'

"Son, this is going to hurt me more than it's going to hurt you."

"The gods aren't angry, Tara. They're just hurt and disappointed."

"You can't live in our basement. Your brother beat you to it."