Fairy Tale Revitalist Gifts

'It's the best we could expect - Goldilocks was given an ASBO.'

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

A fairy with wand and crown in pink tutu

"I don't care about the rating on Goodreads. We're reading Cinderella!"

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

'That's not really what I meant by 'let your hair down', Rapunzel.'

The Fourth Little Pig

Swan Fairy Tales

It's not because I'm nervous. The reason I'm not eating is because I really do have butterflies in my stomach.

Pinocchio's nose used by cat as a scratching post

The tooth fairy.

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

A Fairytale Update

'Are you made of sugar?'

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

Dragon Hair-dryer.

"If I can't ask for more wishes, how about more genies?"

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

The Mouse Princess

"We're pleased to announce that your company has shrewdly traded a cow for some magic beans." some ma

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

"Snow White! It's the dancing, singing woodland creatures wondering if you want to go down the pub."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

Rapunzel in the Morning

Through the Looking Glass - Queen Alice with Frog

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

Rape of the Lock- The Dream

'Hang on a minute: You're not going to transform into a Prince and leave me heartbroken, are you?!'

"Ever since you changed from a frog to a Prince you seem a little jumpy!"

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"What the hell took so long?"