Expecting A New Baby Gifts

"It's not that I don't want a baby brother - it's just that this is a bad time for me developmentally."

Okay, one more time... Mom is expecting a baby, but that doesn't mean you'll be sold as a used kid. Got it now?

'A baby brother? — I'm not ready to make a commitment like that!'

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"They grow up so fast."

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

'We had the baby's ultrasound photo made into wallpaper.'

The Baby Walker

'I told you it would be useful.'

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

TAP TAP TAP TAP

"I'd like to get my hands on whoever coined the phrase 'sleeps like a baby'."

Man dreams of romance whilst a woman dreams of romance and babies.

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

'I guess mother and baby are doing fine. She's already sending out selfies.'

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

'She's just great with the children.'

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

"I don't know, kids. I've been a stay-at-home dad for so long it just sort of... happened."

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

"Will you be putting her in day care or bringing her up artisanally?"

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

"Have you and Tim picked out a name for the career obstacle yet?"

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'