Ethnic Humor Enthusiast Pillows

'You're having Hispanic attacks.'

"There's not a large audience for your type of ethnic humor. After all, how many Peruvian-Greeks are there?"

'It's the law of the puszta, son. Them tripping on a banana skin, that's funny. Us tripping on a banana skin, that's a conspiracy!'

"Your Jewish shtick didn't work, you don't come across as gay..can you be a minority?"

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

"We don't have knock-knock jokes on Christmas."

Unpopular Street Signs: Go, Please Litter, Yes Parking, Garbage Collection - Sometimes Never - Mon-Fri.

"Yes, I have seen people in worse health than you. But, they were all dead."

Sculptor explaining to tourist in Trafalgar Square that sculpture of pigeon is called 'Retribution - it actually doubles as a giant privy!'

'I can't pronounce either his name or the out-sourced country where he works.'

Walk, Don't Walk, Laugh.

"My left buttock is noticeable larger than my right and my dog is missing his hind legs."

Japa-knees

"I ate something that strongly disagreed with me!"

La Tour 2007.

'I've pencilled in time for the grieving process.'

'Don't you mean rubbish; we're in England!'

"That liver went to someone who doesn't have such a big yap."

Karate Yid

Chugger

"She was a good turtle."

'Oi, you lot, I don't want any funny business.'

Sign on sidewalk: 'Please direct your feet to the sunny side of the street...'

Walk/Don't Walk/Laugh

'What if I am blocking the doorway...It's my shop!'

'Go up there and get those guys busy!'

Lemon Grizzle Cake

'Sorry, I never know what to do with my hands in social situations.'

'Don't worry dear, he's waiting for a fly.'

'On your mark...'

Two water towers, 'HOT, COLD'.

'When do I learn to elude the cops?'

Monk and Nut Cracker

Psy and the end of the world.