Eternal Performer Gifts

"Nope. No mistake. You’ve been booked... forever."

"Joan has a 'young voice' for her age!"

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

'He never listened to his mother!'

"Tonight the part normally played by the audience will be played by actors playing the part of the audience."

"Can you just once get to the damn point without the usual embellishments?"

Damned if you do...

Last Chance To take Selfie For All Eternity.

Snake listening to music on headphones.

Football Angel

"Instead of careful interpretation of the prose, maybe try pronouncing even the most basic words like an insane person?"

"If I were a carpenter"

"Wherever he is, I know he'll be upgraded."

"Wow. Tough cloud."

Cemetary memorial shows PIN number never revealed to heirs.

'I don't go much on the picture, but I think the theme music will be a hit.'

'Me retire? Never!!!'

"I had his name spelled wrong on purpose. It will drive him mad ...forever!"

'I want to be buried in the smoking section!'

"Are you sure you should be on this list?!"

A never ending 3D maze knot.

"It's amazing how some people manage to make all of eternity seem even longer."

"Continuous piped music! No wonder so many opt for reincarnation."

Cavemen and ballet dancers

Stonehenge Theatre

"Ding dong ditch is fun, but it's better to watch their reactions when you pretend to be soliciting."

"Is it my imagination, Moira, or has the clock stopped ticking?"

"Three guesses."

"Dang...this day feels never ending..."

"Eventually, Howard wants to dump himself in the Atlantic and serve as an artificial reef for fish."

"Of course we allow smartphones, just not thumbs..."

"You're an oaf but we do need more funny people."

"O.K., but this time with a little less feeling."

'Don't get me started - I could go on about infinity forever.'

(heaven): true, I came into and left the world naked, in-between a great legacy