Elephant Keeper Gifts

'Shake, boy! Shake hands!'

Elephant with a knot in his trunk.

Elephant

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

Billy would watch his ant farm for hours on end.

"I think the ants are mooning me again."

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

'Of course you're out of gas. You forgot to fill up at the last stop...maybe this will teach you to stop daydreaming.'

"Is this the same gold bar I gave you last year?"

"Okay, you can keep 'em, but if they grow any bigger, they'll have to sleep in the kitchen."

"Has anyone turned in a chicken?"

Elephant ass selfie.

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

The circus diver.

'By Jove, we've finally found it! the fabled elephants' disco!'

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

'Peekaboo!'

"'Course I've seen one before...but never one that ate peanuts!"

Bob realised that he'd had his binoculars back to front.

'All I said was 'belly up to the bar'.'

Table Of The Elephants

'Yes, the baby should arrive soon: Her nesting instinct is in overdrive!'

"I thought you were getting me a dog?"

"Man, these closed book exams suck! Who could possibly remember all this crap?"

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

'You know what I really like in someone? Bulk!'

'You may have found more new customers than the other salesmen, but your profits are too small! Stop just pulling in peanuts, Barry!'

'Jumbo waits for the tusk fairy'

'I haven't been able to go to sleep in this new bowl.'

Domestic event in the Zoological Gardens No. I. - The nose of the hippopotamus put out of joint by the young elephant

Ernie's spent his entire career studying one species. He says everything else is "irrelephant."

Zoo warden attempting to impress woman visitor

"I was going to get a cat but they had an offer on."

"You finished with your peanuts?"