Elder Care Supporter Gifts

"Did you say you've been diagnosed with Alzheimer's. . . I'd forget about it!"

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

Handle With Care

"Did you remember my mints?"

"Careful."

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

"I've made a list of lists we need to make."

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

"Someone to see you!"

My Mother Was Absolutely Certain She Would Not Succumb to Alzheimer's. She Was Wrong.

"Sure I'm depressed - now they got me on this geriatric dog food."

Old woman with trolley full of medication.

"Nice try, but I don't think whisky counts as an 'essential medication'."

'How do you feel when you get up in the morning?' 'Amazed!'

Introducing Life Alarm for people who have fallen but don't want to get up.

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

'I don't know which health issue should concern me more - the voices in my head or the fact that I need a hearing aid to hear them.'

"Don't worry - the Power of Dad still trumps the Power of Attorney."

'Be assured about you mother's memory - we back up all the residents onto hard disk once a week.'

Fetch the Walker

"It's Meals-on-Wheels, Mrs. Hokenstadt."

"Alright, Grandfather, let's check your ticker."

Caution Student Driver.

"What's your question for 'Ask Sadie'?" "My mom's in a nursing home. I think someone's stealing her jewelry." "What's the matter, you're afraid someone is stealing your inheritance?" "Simple solution: Send your mother to Japan, where their entire culture reveres the elderly." "Sayonara, grandma!!!" "Are you sure that's not just a stereotype?" "Who cares?!"

"For someone your age, the yearly premium on a $5,000 policy is $8,000."

'When you get older everything hurts... and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

How to save money on geriatric care?

The Leap of Faith Taken by Alzheimer's Caregivers

"Methuselah's been retired for over 800 years, but what is he retired from?"

Care Home Eject Button.

"My butt is loose!"

I'm not sure when I can help you. It's not easy getting parts for you anymore

Getting Old Sucks: "Incontinence hotline. Can you hold please?"

Face it, Sven, we're old - pillage doesn't mean what it used to mean.