Edu-joker Gifts

We must stand up..against incompetence

'It's rather unorthodox, but it appears the deposit refund on the empties will cover your first interest payment.'

A=Pi r 2, 'All this stuff about 'pie are square' makes me HUNGRY!'

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

'...And here we have the 'Laugher Curve.''

"Can you change this quiz grade from an A to a C? I like to keep expectations low until I blow my parents' mind by acing the final exam."

''C-minus'? ??" Do you know how long it took me to find and download this term paper?'

"Nous somme desir-eh, go, er, allez, erm, universitaire français, s'il vous plait."

"Political Science... that's in the Department of Performing Arts."

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"Damn it, nurse! I didn't ask for a twenty. I asked for a ten and two fives."

'Ms. Blumter, please get me a copy of Educational Leadership for Dummies.'

'I reckon we have grounds for a libel action, don't you?.'

I'm doing poorly, but that's without performance enhancing drugs.

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

Crisis Buzz.

"Well, if the test is multiple choice I choose not to take it."

History. The worst past is my dad says they're still making history!

'How could I have missed these? I took a multivitamin.'

University of Hard Knocks

'Dr. Young is a professor at one of the nation's leading party schools.'

Laboratory: Protons /Electrons/Morons

'Today: The collective unconscious...'

Thomas Carlyle

"Solar flares may be a contributing factor or perhaps it's a negative vibe sensitivity...."

'I wish you had chosen a more pertinent educational issue than 'Do Dogs Actually Eat Homework?''

Dept. de Philosophie

Physics 101. An object in motion remaining in motion is an example of what law? Easy come, easy go!

Graduation Day At A Party School

That's Roderick Sloan, the Alvin Meriwether professor of business administration, and with him is Alvin Meriwether, the Roderick Sloan professor of economics.

"You have to not only show your answer, you have to show how you got your answer."

'But your book proved that gravity is a very weak force.'

'You see! I told you there was a school right beneath us!'

'For years, I've had Bobo take care of all my admin paperwork so that I can concentrate on my research: Nobody seems to have noticed...'