Driving Test Humor Aficionado Gifts

"Could we try parking again please, Mr. Zog?"

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

Kick-line Deer Crossing. A kick-line of deer cross the road Radio City Rockettes style.

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

"This one contains our tailgating deterrent feature."

'Congratulations. You've passed.'

Ducks crossing.

Installing one of the new 'Buck Bridges' reduced Bob's auto insurance by 21%.

Speed Checked By Radar.

"I've caught you not stopping at a red light."

Shouldn't you clean the windscreen?

"Check your mirrors. Signal before pulling into traffic. And watch that lead foot!"

Comedy Club. Open Mic Nite. A car doing comedy? It it's like mine, it'll make funny noises!

Motorway lane for 'Pricks and idiots only'.

'Installing 6 foot spikes to stop cars from tailgating me.'

'When you get your permit, you get to sit over here in the driver's seat.'

Right lane ends 500 feet. . .Cheer up - it begins again 3 miles.

Man driving in tree to wife: 'I think we're lost.'

Honk honk here, honk honk there, everywhere a honk honk

'Hey -- Watch it with the tailgating'

"Watch out Stan, we've got a tail-gater."

'I'm giving you a ticket for driving too slow.'

Drinker at bar: 'No more for me, thanks. Any more and I slur the words I'm texting in the car...'

"Could be just a coincidence, but that whining noise seems to stop when your husband gets out of the car."

I take it back - He's not writing a text and driving, he's illustrating a text and driving.

How's my Reaction Time? Call 1-800-OLDTIMER.

Chief, call you back. Something's come up.

"Flashed again....Anyone would think I was on full beam!"

Humpty Dumpty's car.

"The Accelerator."

"Okay...when the light turns red, you stop. When the light turns green, you go."

This lane reserved for average persons only.

Caution: Armed Student Driver

'Okay, which ones are the bad guys?'