Driving Test Humor Aficionado Gifts

"Could we try parking again please, Mr. Zog?"

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

Kick-line Deer Crossing. A kick-line of deer cross the road Radio City Rockettes style.

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

'Congratulations. You've passed.'

"This one contains our tailgating deterrent feature."

Ducks crossing.

Speed Checked By Radar.

"I've caught you not stopping at a red light."

Shouldn't you clean the windscreen?

"Check your mirrors. Signal before pulling into traffic. And watch that lead foot!"

Motorway lane for 'Pricks and idiots only'.

'Installing 6 foot spikes to stop cars from tailgating me.'

'When you get your permit, you get to sit over here in the driver's seat.'

"Could be just a coincidence, but that whining noise seems to stop when your husband gets out of the car."

'I'm giving you a ticket for driving too slow.'

Man driving in tree to wife: 'I think we're lost.'

"Watch out Stan, we've got a tail-gater."

'Hey -- Watch it with the tailgating'

Right lane ends 500 feet. . .Cheer up - it begins again 3 miles.

Drinker at bar: 'No more for me, thanks. Any more and I slur the words I'm texting in the car...'

How's my Reaction Time? Call 1-800-OLDTIMER.

Chief, call you back. Something's come up.

Get You Home Tow Truck.

Humpty Dumpty's car.

"Okay...when the light turns red, you stop. When the light turns green, you go."

'Okay, which ones are the bad guys?'

"Flashed again....Anyone would think I was on full beam!"

"The Accelerator."

This lane reserved for average persons only.

Caution: Armed Student Driver