Divorce Drama Enthusiast Gifts

"Looks like the Huffman divorce is in previews."

'I'm sorry you were found guilty.'

'Next item: who gets custody of the dog?'

'Alimony is like having to pay instalments on a car after you have written it off!'

'Your alimony claim appears to be dead in the water. Your ex-husband has filed a complaint with the European Court of Human Rights.'

"...and to my ex-wife, who hates my guts, I leave the contents of my colon..."

Party of the 3rd Part

"This is my new divorce lawyer."

Theatre Masks and Butts

"I can't believe he brought her."

Lord George brings news of the debate

"Helen, I have decided to seek a change of venue, since it has grown increasingly obvious that I can no longer get a fair trial in this household."

"Matt, you look like you just saw a ghost who fired you!"

"My wife's lawyer doesn't understand me."

"Blog always makes it all about Blog."

"Oh, you haven’t seen holiday drama ‘till you’ve met our little family."

"Can you recommend something for the attorney who got me everything?"

'Your therapy helped me leave Frank. Franks wants to thank you personally.'

"I got another callback. My agent says it's between me and the guy who's going to get it."

Rent-a-Drama: "How many tweens will you need for your event?"

"It was a typical 'His lawyer said/Her lawyer said' situation."

The Harold Pinter theatre...

"So Mr. Claus, there is a Virginia!"

"Shakespeare wants to kill off the leads and destroy any franchise potential. I tell you these artist types can never see the big picture."

'Is your client qualified to give a urine sample.'

"This time, she went too far."

"An 'Irish divorce' doesn't have quite the same ring to it as a 'Mexican divorce'."

'Don't blame the King, Ma'am. This was all his divorce lawyer's idea.'

'What a surprise,darling - a squatter!'

Covid Masks

"F.Y.I., sweetie, bears are attracted to drama."

"...your ex-wife also mentions a gold filling."

'You were right - the honeymoon is a bad time to get to know a gal!'

"Don't walk away from me while I'm not paying any attention to you."

"I haven't finished saying no yet."