Divorce Enthusiasts Gifts

"I wish you'd be more supportive of my efforts to divorce you."

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

As long as there are husbands, we'll get our's money's worth!

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

'I'm with my minister father and my senator mom through the week and my senator mom through the week. I'm the ultimate division between Church and State.'

"I have been happily married... three times!"

"My wife's lawyer doesn't understand me."

"Can you recommend something for the attorney who got me everything?"

'No, there isn't a probationary period!'

'Your therapy helped me leave Frank. Franks wants to thank you personally.'

"I'm the lot of baggage he comes with."

So all is not rosy in the garden?

'I'm not the sitting tenant, I'm your husband.'

"I love marriage...It's my husband I hate."

Apply to marry multi-marriage failure.

'I thought Lobsters mate for life.'

Gender Symbols

"I married for contrast."

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, for whatever that's worth these days.'

"Why, it's a little piece of red yarn! Oh Harold, you always know JUST what to get me."

"Looks like the Huffman divorce is in previews."

"An 'Irish divorce' doesn't have quite the same ring to it as a 'Mexican divorce'."

"That's Stuart and Vivian Muntner. They're a one-marriage family."

"Well, Pook, here's to one old marriage that just won't go away."

"I agreed to 'for better' and 'for worse,' but never to 'for mysterious' and 'withholding'."

"I went ahead and got married without knowing the possible side effects."

'You were right - the honeymoon is a bad time to get to know a gal!'

'And I thought I was leaving you.'

"...your ex-wife also mentions a gold filling."

'Will you marry me, Miss?'

'I'm sorry you were found guilty.'

The widow's intended: 'Well, Tommy, has your mother told you of my good fortune.' Tommy: 'No. She only said she was going to marry you!'