Divorce Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"I wish you'd be more supportive of my efforts to divorce you."

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

As long as there are husbands, we'll get our's money's worth!

'This chair ain't big enough for the both of us.'

'...better or worse...better or worse...better or worse...'

"I have been happily married... three times!"

'I'm with my minister father and my senator mom through the week and my senator mom through the week. I'm the ultimate division between Church and State.'

"My wife's lawyer doesn't understand me."

"Can you recommend something for the attorney who got me everything?"

'No, there isn't a probationary period!'

'Your therapy helped me leave Frank. Franks wants to thank you personally.'

So all is not rosy in the garden?

"I'm the lot of baggage he comes with."

Kindly readers, our resident counselor, Sadie Cohen, will be answering actual questions sent to her via email. Prepare to get an earful of wisdom! Dr. Sadie, I am in a relationship with a beautiful woman who I wish to marry but am still reeling from my first marriage scares me. How do I get over that fear? Signed, Fearful in Salt Lake City. Fear is a worthless emotion. It doesn't help at all. What you should be feeling is terror. Run for your life.

'I'm not the sitting tenant, I'm your husband.'

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, for whatever that's worth these days.'

"I love marriage...It's my husband I hate."

'We haven't been seeing eye-to-eye lately.'

Gender Symbols

"I married for contrast."

Apply to marry multi-marriage failure.

'I thought Lobsters mate for life.'

"Why, it's a little piece of red yarn! Oh Harold, you always know JUST what to get me."

"Looks like the Huffman divorce is in previews."

"That's Stuart and Vivian Muntner. They're a one-marriage family."

"Well, Pook, here's to one old marriage that just won't go away."

"An 'Irish divorce' doesn't have quite the same ring to it as a 'Mexican divorce'."

"I agreed to 'for better' and 'for worse,' but never to 'for mysterious' and 'withholding'."

"I went ahead and got married without knowing the possible side effects."

'You were right - the honeymoon is a bad time to get to know a gal!'

'And I thought I was leaving you.'

"...your ex-wife also mentions a gold filling."

'I'm sorry you were found guilty.'

The widow's intended: 'Well, Tommy, has your mother told you of my good fortune.' Tommy: 'No. She only said she was going to marry you!'