Divine Humor Seekers Gifts

The loving, yet vengeful God of Cheshire!

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

Night-time halo

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

"OMG, LOL!"

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

'Read that last part back to me.'

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

Vicar wearing sunglasses.

God passing the time.

'I'm afraid there is no Book of Loophole.'

Needless to say, God forgot the legs.

"No, you cannot have another planet. You only played with the last one for a week."

'I'm new here...how can you tell the real 'Elvis' from the impersonators?'

"Maybe you're right. Maybe the multiple exclamation points come across as over excited and insincere."

''Born again'? -- but I was just born five years ago!'

Out for lunch... GOD

"Imagine! In the past year alone, Thomas Jefferson has learned to speak Swahili and play the glockenspiel."

Excommunicate Me.

'Have you got anything for omnipotence?'

'5.40pm on the 2nd day....and still waiting for the surveyor'

"Looks like we're in trouble now...he's got four bars on that thing."

'Now that's what I call a religious broadcast.'

Shortly after being accepted into John's heart, Jesus lodged in aorta.

You may have hired the best lawyer but I don't think that you can sue God because of a downgoing Dow Jones, sir.

"Oh, I know He works in mysterious ways, but if I worked that mysteriously I'd get fired."

'I really can't think of a blessed thing to preach about this morning, so I'll entertain questions from the floor.'