Godlike Humor Seekers Gifts

'It's His own fault for inventing irony...He's angry about His electricity bill.'

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

Divine Desk Bins

"I brought my worn out shoes because I heard that confession was good for the sole!"

"Imagine! In the past year alone, Thomas Jefferson has learned to speak Swahili and play the glockenspiel."

"Wow. I just had a near life experience!"

Angels Playing Frisbee with a Halo.

"It doesn't work on geese."

"Are you sure that this is really the way? I thought there was a staircase or highway?" "Maybe we should just go back down and pray!"

"I may be a jackal-headed god of the underworld, Janet, but I'm also your lawyer."

'Relax, you are in doggy heaven. I'm just from a temp service.'

God's attempt to stay incognito failed.

'If your guru business is slow, do what I did. Get a professional website presence on the Internet. That's how you found me, right?'

"Did you do all of this for me?"

"So how come you never sent them a 'common-sense' pandemic."

'Your accountant is insisting you return...something about dying inefficiently!'

"Gee, I always figured him for No. 1!"

'I'm sorry, but you missed too many easy layups.'

'You're not going to like this - just learned you're being sued for corn seed patent infringement.'

The Zeusettes

Jesus Suddenly Realizes It's Almost Father's Day

'Oh, sure -- but He won't let US have pets!'

"I'm sick of these bugs"

Angels Caught on Devil Tails

'If God is your co-pilot, let him drive!'

"Okay, I'll see what I can do about getting a copy of the autopsy."