Divine Humor Seeker Gifts

"Are you sure that this is really the way? I thought there was a staircase or highway?" "Maybe we should just go back down and pray!"

Business for sale.

Today's Sermon: The Fall Of Man

Got omnipotence?

On the eighth day God created blasphemy.

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

Night-time halo

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"It's cool – God told us to!"

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"OMG, LOL!"

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

'It's not for myself, you understand."

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

The loving, yet vengeful God of Cheshire!

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

'Read that last part back to me.'

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

Vicar wearing sunglasses.

God passing the time.

'I'm afraid there is no Book of Loophole.'

"No, you cannot have another planet. You only played with the last one for a week."

Needless to say, God forgot the legs.

"Whew! What a day! I just get out of bed and all Hell breaks loose."

"My name's God, and I approve this message."

'I'm new here...how can you tell the real 'Elvis' from the impersonators?'

"Maybe you're right. Maybe the multiple exclamation points come across as over excited and insincere."