Divine Humor Gifts

"Billy's cheating, Susan is lying, Dave, no, that's Gary, no, Bob. Bob's stealing?"

'I don't know. I woke up with it after preaching last weeks sermon...'

'When you pray, does God have call waiting?'

"Are you even listening? I'm an arch-angel. There's no such thing as an investor angel!"

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

Night-time halo

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"It's cool – God told us to!"

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"OMG, LOL!"

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

The loving, yet vengeful God of Cheshire!

"And almighty God said to Adam, 'Get a room already will ya!'" "Little known fact from the Book of Genesis."

"And on the twelfth day the Lord just puttered around... Did I put that cloud there? Looks out of place. Did I do that? Oh, well..."

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

'Read that last part back to me.'

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

"Beware of God"

Vicar wearing sunglasses.

God passing the time.

'I'm afraid there is no Book of Loophole.'

"No, you cannot have another planet. You only played with the last one for a week."

"Whew! What a day! I just get out of bed and all Hell breaks loose."

"My name's God, and I approve this message."

2pm meet your Creator