Discipline Guru Gifts

Ms. Hudson had noticed a sharp decline in misbehavior ever since the rear-view mirrors were installed.

'Tom, I warned you that the next fight you got into, I was going to apply economic sanctions on your allowance.'

He believes an apiary should be run with strict discipline. So it behooves the beehive to behave!

No, he's not metamorphosing. He's in a time-out.

'Do you call this sharpening your parenting skills?'

By making bogus voodoo dolls of her more unruly students...

'And to think I started out as a little bundle of joy.'

"What're you in for?"

"Sorry I didn't take out the garbage."

"As a principal, teachers will send unruly students to your office and you will send unruly teachers to my office."

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

Man practising karate is tempted by a glass of beer.

"In economics, I got an IOU."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

You gotta hand it to the old man, he still knows how to motivate!

'He's finally done it - kicked breakfast TV!'

Kirsten Johnson

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

'We're the parents. What we say goes. . . In one ear and out the other.'

"How'd I do on the test?"

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

"These fourth grade marks are confusing...I got a B on the assignment, so is that like a smiley face or a star?"

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"Making us more mobile friendly didn't mean letting the general public use our car park, Smithers."

Examiners.

"Report card."

"And what did my little darling do in school today?"

"But it did take hard work to get my A, B, C and D in that order down the card."

'I figured if 1 is good for milk, why not schoolwork, too?'

'I don't know whether these are good grades or not. The teacher calls them unique.'

"I make money, therefore I am."

'Don't come down until your thirty five.'

"All As? Are you hacking into the school's records again?"

"Our accountant is great. We were a C corp, but now we're a B- corp."