Educational Guru Gifts

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

"I was solving those same problems when I was your age."

"Maybe when they're a little older, my son can help yours with his homework."

"I'm here to put a smile into your training."

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

"This is the most important election of our lifetime."

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

Washington D.C., Acronym Capital of the World

'Don't worry. No one else knows what they are doing either.'

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

'Now then - I just wanted to see how you handle pressure, Mr. Boyle.'

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

"... And to our friends in the Liberal Democratic party I award thirty pieces of silver."

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

"My best managerial trait is that I dig for answers until I get them between my teeth. My worst trait is that sometimes I bury them."

"He thought this would illustrate the company hierarchy more clearly than the organizational chart."

"Unless one is a humorist, Haskins. One should avoid attempts at humor."

"I always try to give out at least one genuine compliment per day. I don't always succeed."

'Hey! What's the big idea!?!'

Whack-a-mole CEO.

"I can't sit down. Don't you remember? I worked my butt off for you."

'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'

'...And for the low visibility positions we can bring people on board who can, you know...do things.'

'I'm looking for an assistant who knows my job, can do my job, but has no interest in having my job.'

'Ask yourself, 'What is it I'm not doing?', and then ask yourself, 'What is it I'm doing too much?'.'

'I like to greet the new team members myself.'

"We may have to rob from the rich AND the poor."

"If you really want to get ahead you'll need to stop licking your own butt and start licking mine."

"Leadership ISN'T just about trying to be BETTER than everyone else!"

Kirsten Johnson

'Now, who owns this project?'