Dining Drama King Gifts

'If you're in a hurry, why did you order the snails?'

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

"I'm not trying to freak you out, but your eel roll is moving."

'We'll get our food....eventually.'

"House red, sir?"

'The tax and tip I understand, but what's this charge for shipping and handling?'

Waiter: 'Your Tossed salad Ma'am.'

'Trouble cutting pickled onions.'

'So, not your favourite restuarant anymore...'

'I hear there's a fly in your soup?'

"What will change my life?"

'Macaroni and cheese, three nights in a row?... That's justifiable homicide in my book!'

"How was the food sir?"

"Waiter, there's a fly in my soup, and ironically, there's also a crouton in my s**t."

"Hi again. Can I just check whether you enjoyed me interrupting your meal five minutes ago to ask whether you were enjoying your meal?"

"How's everything?"

"Waiter - this dish doesn't contain enough adjectives..!"

Now squeeze sharply five times - that should dislodge the tip from his coat pocket.

"Good evening, my name is Hank. I'm your waiter tonight. This is Eddy, he is our cooks' lawyer."

'I was doing REALLY well, and then I sleepwalked last night and at a 20-pound bag of potatoes!'

"Here are Monsieur Limace, our sommelier, Monsiere Juron, chef de Cuisine and Mr Kruigshenk, specialist for the beheading of breakfast eggs."

"Quick! Tiptoe out and phone the Fire Service!"

'A fly in your soup, eh? -- Call me if it gets any worse.'

'Can you send this back to the kitchen. It's cold.'

"I have an awful toothache. But I sort of forgot to re-sig up for Obamacare. SO now I have to wait till next year to get treated."

"There, dammit. Is that enough pepper for you??"

'You did ask for the wine steward - now grovel, man, grovel!'

Fly at the tennis club cafe.

'Careful, this plate may be a little hot.'

"Hello, Sir! Remember me? You were always putting me in detention. . . Would you like to order now?"

A gentleman and his butler in a dining room.

'I'll have the dessert list and he'll have the Heimlich maneuver.'

"And don't try to pull the old 'good wine steward, bad wine steward' routine."

"The truth is, I don't even know who you are anymore. Let's see some ID."