Dermatology Devotees Pillows

Dermatologist reading a 'Journal of Itchcraft'.

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

'You have a strawberry on your nose, I'll give you some cream to put on it!'

"Too much concealer?"

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

'The hair specialist is down the hall.'

PROBLEM AREAS

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

'Well, Mr. 'I don't need any sunblock', what have you got to say for yourself now?'

'I think it's damn unprofessional for a dermatologist to scream 'Yikes' like that.'

"Eternally youthful complexion? Here's the deal. Never go out in the sun. Never eat dessert. And, for God's sake, don't smile."

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

'You need to do something about your dry skin.'

S.P.F. 1,000

'If it doesn't itch, why worry?'

'Apply that ointment as directed and call me if the growth does not reduce or it starts to talk.'

"If they do let anyone go I don't think age will be a consideration. You shouldn't kill yourself trying to look younger than you are."

"Sure I used drugs when I was your age, but they were all prescribed for acne."

New Twenty Blades

Desert Dermatologist

"Well, what number sunscreen are you using?"

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

"The biopsy on your mole came back negative, which is positive, which is good."

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

'You do Botox?'

Sunburn lotion, Windburn lotion.

"Have you been scratching this?"

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'

"Another barnacle?!" "I was a teenage creature."

'Botox...'

'You've got dry scalp.'