Dermatological Enthusiast Pillows

"What's the strongest after-sun you sell?"

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

We did a biopsy on the mole we removed, and it turns out it was just an old piece of chocolate.

'You have a strawberry on your nose, I'll give you some cream to put on it!'

'The hair specialist is down the hall.'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

PROBLEM AREAS

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

'Well, Mr. 'I don't need any sunblock', what have you got to say for yourself now?'

'I think it's damn unprofessional for a dermatologist to scream 'Yikes' like that.'

"Eternally youthful complexion? Here's the deal. Never go out in the sun. Never eat dessert. And, for God's sake, don't smile."

Pop Culture for Teens

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

'You need to do something about your dry skin.'

S.P.F. 1,000

'If it doesn't itch, why worry?'

'Apply that ointment as directed and call me if the growth does not reduce or it starts to talk.'

"Sure I used drugs when I was your age, but they were all prescribed for acne."

"Well, what number sunscreen are you using?"

Desert Dermatologist

Dermatologist reading a 'Journal of Itchcraft'.

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

"The biopsy on your mole came back negative, which is positive, which is good."

Sunburn lotion, Windburn lotion.

'You do Botox?'

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'

"Do you have anything that can help remove dark circles from under my eyes?"

"Another barnacle?!" "I was a teenage creature."

"Look on the bright side – the Rogaine worked!"