Defence Lawyer Gifts

'Next time the prosecutor shows you pictures of the crime scene, try not to blurt out, ‘Been there, done that.''

'Not guilty? Are you kidding me, Mr. Defence Lawyer? Any man wearing a tie as ugly as your client's, must be guilty!'

'Oh, no! They've got a Swiss-army defence lawyer!'

"I've told you not to do that to the jury."

'Obviously my client is not competent to stand trial, Your Honor -- he's wearing a Nehru jacket, for heaven's sake!'

How to Settle Anything Out of Court: 'Mr Yomp, it's Alan Dershowitz on line two...'

'My client only committed the crime because of his burning ambition to write a book.'

'And here is my other DNA test.'

"We make crime pay."

"Oh I never lose any sleep over my criminal cases. I figure that even if I lose, I'm not the one going to Jail!"

"While my client was not victorious in proving his innocence today, I hope you'll join me in a round of applause for one heck of an effort."

Trial by Media

"Good boy."

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"You're fired."

Opportunities in Coronatimes

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

Lynching on social media

Hollywood Sign Developers

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

Now leaving designated Free Speech Zone. Shut it!

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

Flags

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

Campaign for Plain English

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.