Defence Lawyer Pillows

'Next time the prosecutor shows you pictures of the crime scene, try not to blurt out, ‘Been there, done that.''

'Not guilty? Are you kidding me, Mr. Defence Lawyer? Any man wearing a tie as ugly as your client's, must be guilty!'

'Oh, no! They've got a Swiss-army defence lawyer!'

"I've told you not to do that to the jury."

'Obviously my client is not competent to stand trial, Your Honor -- he's wearing a Nehru jacket, for heaven's sake!'

'My client only committed the crime because of his burning ambition to write a book.'

'And here is my other DNA test.'

"We make crime pay."

"Oh I never lose any sleep over my criminal cases. I figure that even if I lose, I'm not the one going to Jail!"

Trial by Media

Opportunities in Coronatimes

"You're fired."

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"Good boy."

Lynching on social media

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

Now leaving designated Free Speech Zone. Shut it!

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

Flags

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

Campaign for Plain English

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."