Data Dodger Gifts

'I needed some relief from data overload.'

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"Peterson proposes we move out of the mountains."

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

Charities should investigate whether published reports are 'Misleadingly Positive'.

"We've done a rigorous examination of your business plan using the latest algorithms to model future profits. . . which way up would you like it?"

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

"So, in conclusion, I would like to say that although I haven't actually read the book, I still found it a fascinating and enriching experience.

'The question is - to what level of data do we wish to stoop.'

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

"There's a lot of uncertainty out there these days. Or not. Who knows?"

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

'He's kind of a rescue dog. He points to where the hardest work is, so that I can run into the opposite direction!'

'Maybe we have the wrong subject for this brain mapping project.'

Violent Crime Statistics

"Eureka! Details to follow."

'We have some facts about you that you don't remember, some that you thought were really secret, and some that never even happened.'

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

'Please, Ma'am — I'm running out of paper!'

The good news is that I've got all the figures...the BAD news is that I'm not sure what order to put them in!

'86.4% of people use phony statistics to get their point across.'

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

It's spooky how Amazon can track you down

'It looks like our data.'

"Look, the numbers don't lie."

"You question my methodology? Perhaps you should question your questionology."

"Of course it's only prediction, we can't guarantee anything."

"The red bars represent the obscene numbers this quarter. The black bars are censoring those red bars."

'Look, half the work is done! All you need to do is fill in the top part so we can legally say the bottom part.'

"...and this one deals with the accuracy of the others."

"The economic modeling of our economic modeling suggests we need to remodel."

'I think I know what the problem is!'