Current Traveler Gifts

The Friendly Antipodes

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Easter Island legs

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

Tourists in Egypt

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

Child on an airplane wearing a shirt with a switch that says "Airplane mode"

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

Off to see the world

Vaccination Passport

Lenin, Anticipating His Arrival at Finland Station, Sees His Baggage Taken Off at Beloostrov.

"We'll get there when we get there!"

Remember, it's about the journey, not the destination. But sure, I'll keep an eye out for a rest area.

A white collar cow.

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

"Your driver will arrive in 4...9...17 minutes after three accidental loops around the airport."

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

Busking during a pandemic

When travelling with her cat by plane, train, or bus, dawn always ensured no one would bother them.

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

"They're worse than carpenter ants. We have hacker ants."

"I downloaded a new app that puts me on a tropical island no matter where I'm at."

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

'It's a great job, but the commuting is murder!'

Virtual Beach

'Anything to declare?'

Miniature Trailer on Desert Island