Culinary Cubicle Conqueror Gifts

"I get a fresh food kit delivered for lunch. All I need to do is chop, cook, and enjoy!"

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

'How many times have I told to seize the day before it seizes you?'

Tension filled the tent.

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

'Will you be long, fixing this leak? I'll have to put my Bert's dinner on in ten minutes.'

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”

Kiss the Commander in Chef

"Do you know I fought an hour with that salmon you're eating."

There! I've made my year's supply of zucchini bread! That's kind of a lot. How can you store them all? It's no problem. I just throw out last year's supply.

Am Awful Crammer.

"He said his screen is frozen again."

Well, what did you expect on the mother ship?

"We've made it more hellish by modeling it after corporate workplaces."

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'

"You know, statistically speaking, at least one of these gingerbread men is gay."

"If you're such an expert, you cook the lobster next time."

"The night raid on the kitchen bench was a disaster sir! The owner woke up, came downstairs for a glass of water and attacked us!"

"It'll never be ready in time."

"The first of many cubicles..."

"Jones is our go-to-thankless-job-guy!"

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

"I'm a strict vegan with dietary limitations due to specific food allergies. What should I get?" "A taxi."

'I'm 43 years old. That's 64 in work years.'

"I want to set the world record for eating the most empanadas ever!"

'No good deed goes unpunished around here.'

A woman's work is never done!

"It's not that you're a failure. It's that you completely lack the capacity for success."

"I see myself rising through the ranks of the organization until midlife, when I will most likely hit a wall and go screaming through the door."