Cruise Enthusiast Gifts

Santa Cruise

"A 40 day cruise? Just the two of us without the kids? Oh, Harold, This'll be the best vacation ever! I hope it doesn't rain!"

A cruise ship parks as part of birthday cake.

"We're interested in ocean cruises. The Atlantic for me and the Pacific for him."

'Sorry about that, Miss Delsey. I guess the boat wasn't sinking after all.'

"Some cruise! It rained for the entire trip!"

"That Romantic Cruise sounds good, but what do you suggest for my husband's vacation?"

'You heard the man, Harold. It's a formal cruise--go back to the room and put on your black flip-flops.'

'Ten minutes after leaving Southampton, the Queen Mary 2 arrives in Fort Lauderdale.'

Man Overboard and Drink Overboard.

'When you said we'd have to 'live out of our suitcase' on this cruise, I thought it was a figure of speech!'

'Calories!.. I am here!'

"I'll go on a cruise, but not if I'm forced to learn things."

Bad sea-legs

Beluga Cruise Lines ensured that its ships would never lose power.

Caution Wet Floor

"We aim to make every event on this cruise pleasurable, sir!" (lifebuoy with duck head on it).

'I was thinking of booking a Florida cruise...'

"How was your cruise?"

Woman at Ace Travel Agency, sees sign on door - Investment Theme Cruise Cancelled Due To Bankruptcy.

"No! I don't think these are adjustable beds. Why?"

'WHIPLASH!'

"I have serious doubts about the theory of evolution."

'Sorry, but I guess we overbooked our cabins.'

'Sorry - no refunds...'

"This is your captain speaking, everyone relax. It's not an iceberg, it's plastic."

"Does it offer luxury ICU cabins?"

"No ocean views but your cabin does overlook the buffet table."

'I need to lose enough pounds to take a thirty-five meal cruise!'

"Is this the Love Boat?"

I specifically told you to keep it simple --- To not go overboard with the lifeboat drill!

"What's the best ailment I could claim to convince my husband that I need a luxury cruise?"

'Why do you always have to do things the hard way?'

'We're the perfect metaphor for congress.'

"Stick-in-the-mud Cruise"