Cruise Aficionado Gifts

'This is great! I had no idea it was a dinner cruise.'

First class only raft.

Semi-luxury liner.

"We'll see you soon, kids! Your mother and I have won a romantic cruise for two on some man's huge ark."

'We are now passing through the Sicilian Triangle, otherwise known as 'The Drink','

'So you don't think buying a ticket for a gravy boat dinner tour in November is stupid?'

Upper class child with toy cruise ship.

'I don't know about you, but six meals a day are all the activities I can handle.'

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

"Sorry, sir. It's a no-fly cruise."

"Ticket and passport, please."

Egyptian Cruise

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

'Great cruise. When does the buffet open?'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

'See you in two weeks!'

Excess Baggage: When you are on a cruise and they say the ship leaves at 5:30, they really mean the ship leaves at 5:30.

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

'Say, are you in the mood for a Spielberg?'

Excess Baggage: You never have to worry about finding your way around those humongous new cruise ships. Your stomach will lead you.

"I thought the travel agent said 40% off."

'But you're an admiral. How can you feel seasick on a waterbed?'

It is my mother's, she uses it as an anchor for our yacht.

The Desert Island Package

Cruise.

'It always great to get away from it all.'

'The marvelous thing about a Singles cruise is, if you don't find an interesting man, you can drown your sorrows with interesting food.'

"These kids and their shellfies..."

Skiing at Sea

'The travel agent says there's nothing available on the port side. Do you want me to see if she's got anything on the sherry side?'

Scuba diver in a fishmongers

"OK, so you've won the mating fight, but will you please allow me visiting rights to see my kids?"