Cruise Aficionado T-Shirts

'This is great! I had no idea it was a dinner cruise.'

First class only raft.

Semi-luxury liner.

"We'll see you soon, kids! Your mother and I have won a romantic cruise for two on some man's huge ark."

'We are now passing through the Sicilian Triangle, otherwise known as 'The Drink','

Upper class child with toy cruise ship.

'I don't know about you, but six meals a day are all the activities I can handle.'

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

"Sorry, sir. It's a no-fly cruise."

"Ticket and passport, please."

Egyptian Cruise

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

'Great cruise. When does the buffet open?'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

'See you in two weeks!'

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

Excess Baggage: When you are on a cruise and they say the ship leaves at 5:30, they really mean the ship leaves at 5:30.

'Say, are you in the mood for a Spielberg?'

It is my mother's, she uses it as an anchor for our yacht.

"I thought the travel agent said 40% off."

'But you're an admiral. How can you feel seasick on a waterbed?'

Excess Baggage: You never have to worry about finding your way around those humongous new cruise ships. Your stomach will lead you.

The Desert Island Package

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

"I've been at loose ends lately."

Skiing at Sea

'The marvelous thing about a Singles cruise is, if you don't find an interesting man, you can drown your sorrows with interesting food.'

Cruise.

"OK, so you've won the mating fight, but will you please allow me visiting rights to see my kids?"

"Well, we've learned that passengers will mutiny if they are served meatloaf two days in a row... Even if you do call it the South Sea Surprise on the second day!"

Scuba diver in a fishmongers

'It always great to get away from it all.'