Crown Aficionado Gifts

"A Bill of Rights? - Don't you TRUST me?"

'Can you describe it?' Asks as Lost and Found service attendent to the Queen, looking for her crown.

'The Burrito King.'

Queen with her crown stuck on her head.

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

Knight Golfing

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

Birds of the Pacific Northwest: Belted Kingfisher

'Isn't it cute the way they compete so hard?'

Presidential Pooch Meets The Press

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"I know he's funny, boy, but he’s also the president of the United States."

Trading half a kingdom for a lesser steed!

'Of all the technological advances from the last 60 years, this is one's favourite.'

Sir Jasper Murgatroyd

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

"Grant them amnesty and then hang them."

'It's the Secretary-General of the United Nations -- are you here?'

Knights Wing Mirrors.

'This year, Sire, I've created a socko narrative of scatological raillery and rollicking nihilism which ends with a sexy justification for third quarter losses.'

Teddy Roosevelt

"We'll settle this the old-fashioned way - with a dance-off."

"I welcome the discussion."

Disraeli becomes Earl of Beaconsfield

'I'd like three dozen friendship cards -- this war has gone on long enough.'

"Elizabeth Warren? Carly Fiorina? They'd never get elected president. They're not royalty like a Clinton, Bush or Kennedy."

Cat with Crown.

"If we went to war, wouldn't God be on the spot?"

"Mom, this isn't what I meant when I said I wanted to be Iron Man for Halloween."

'My kingdom for a horse! Are you nuts? How about high yielding mutual funds?'

I told you the King wasn't ready for irony!

The Queen

Unicorn Joust

06 Congressional Record.