Crown Aficionados Gifts

'You peasants should be ashamed and embarrassed to have your king appear in this tinny crown and shabby robe!'

'The Burrito King.'

Birds of the Pacific Northwest: Belted Kingfisher

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

King on the toilet whilst jester laughs because the toilet paper is out of reach.

'I'd think you'd be used to having a moat by now.'

"A Bill of Rights? - Don't you TRUST me?"

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

Trading half a kingdom for a lesser steed!

'Of all the technological advances from the last 60 years, this is one's favourite.'

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

"Grant them amnesty and then hang them."

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

'This year, Sire, I've created a socko narrative of scatological raillery and rollicking nihilism which ends with a sexy justification for third quarter losses.'

'Could you scoot your chair over this way a little dear?'

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

"I welcome the discussion."

Disraeli becomes Earl of Beaconsfield

"If we went to war, wouldn't God be on the spot?"

Cat with Crown.

'I'd like three dozen friendship cards -- this war has gone on long enough.'

The Queen

'My son made it for me in shop class.'

"'Happily ever after' you want? Then you keep the house kosher!"

Mouse King

"He mistook jesting for heckling."

'When I first met the queen she was a hat check girl and I had to marry her to get my crown back.'

King Solomon's Wedding"You may kiss the brides. You may also kiss the concubines, but don't make a big tzimmes about it."

'You learned WHAT about me in history class?'

"The Black Plague is getting worse, Sire, but the crime rate is WAY down!"

The Emperor of Irony